Catalog product

Tired of School Catalog Fundraisers, Texas Dad Launches Hilarious GoFundMe

MARBLE FALLS, Texas (KXAN) — A Marble Falls dad hopes to avoid the uncomfortable act of trying to sell random kitchen goods to his neighbors, but still raises the money needed for his youngster’s school son to build a chicken coop. The result is a GoFundMe we think you need to read.

Jacob Taylor says the Tierra Vista Montessori school sent house catalogs to parents — inside: a “Let’s Taco About It” tortilla warmer, an avocado peeler, an egg bite mold (we we don’t even know) and a gourmet melon baller, among other items you didn’t know you needed – and don’t.

  • 'Egg Bite Mold' listed in catalog
  • 'Avocado Peeler' listed in catalog

Taylor didn’t want to go door-to-door with his 18-month-old son selling gourmet avocado peelers and melon dumplings, so he started a GoFundMe instead, begging the public to save him from having to make a sales pitch to his neighbours.

“So what position am I taking, exactly? Here it is: You give me $5. That’s it. You give me $5, I’ll stop bothering you with fundraisers, everyone’s happy. I don’t have to drag my kid all over the neighborhood trying to sell you an avocado peeler for $12 (a real item in this catalog) and you don’t have to give me money for some shit giant that you will never use or enjoy,” Taylor wrote in the GoFundMe.

“A ‘tortilla warmer’ for $18 ^*# dollars!!! Do you know what the difference is between that and just sticking your tortillas in the microwave? $18 is what!

Jacob Taylor, GoFundMe

The other benefit, Taylor points out, is that 100% of GoFundMe money will go to the school and the chicken coop, which will teach students about sustainable agriculture. Meanwhile, if you buy products from the catalog, only 40% of the money will go to the school, according to a letter sent to parents.

To break this down: for an $18 egg bite mold, only about $7 would go to school. Taylor also points out that: “You can literally get the exactly the same on Amazon for $11.88. So you can get an egg mold and STILL have an extra $6.12 to donate to a chicken coop.

Taylor has been a teacher for 16 years and knows the challenges schools face raising funds. He himself had students come to his house to buy products from the catalog. His problem is not with the fundraiser itself, just the fundraising tool.

“Since we are teachers, we have the perspective of ‘we will do everything to provide what the children need.’ I actually posted an update on the GoFundMe that a friend of mine said he would donate $20 to our GoFundMe if I let my daughter cut my hair,” Taylor told You. can see in the video below that Taylor actually did just that.

“Teachers are willing to sacrifice our dignity to help children,” he said.

Taylor assures us that all the money will go to the school. In fact, you may be able to save other parents from selling their catalog products as well.

“Please give me $5. I swear I’ll give it to school, I really, REALLY don’t want to have to sell stuff to strangers,” Taylor wrote.

You can find Taylor’s GoFundMe here.

The school needs $500 to build the co-op. By 3:30 p.m., KXAN viewers had passed that. Taylor says any extra money will be donated to the school.

“You made this teacher’s day, and I know the school and the kids will be so excited!” Taylor posted in an update.